THEDADABASE centralized. dadified. terrible.
+ Submit a Joke

Browse Dad Jokes

// filtered by #FoodAndDrinks — 83
A recent study found ketchup and mustard to be the worst condiments for your health. But it might have been biased; the study was done at the Mayo Clinic.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks Medical
The produce section had a potato wearing glasses. I'm pretty sure it was a spectator.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Disability FoodAndDrinks OneLiner
I always try to be polite, so I tend to knock on my fridge door before opening. After all, there could be a salad dressing.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Clothing FoodAndDrinks OneLiner
We had a bread factory burn down last week. Officials say everything was toast.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Buildings FoodAndDrinks
The answer to all your problems MIGHT be hidden underneath a perfectly cooked steak. It might not, but it's worth checking out. If that doesn't work, you might want to check the bottom of a pan of brownies - I've had luck there, too.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks FunFact
I heard an experience elephant broke out of the circus. It turns out he was tired of working for peanuts.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Animals FoodAndDrinks Work
A new study said that most husbands don't know their wife's favorite flower. But I know my wife's is self-rising.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks Plants Relationships BetterOutLoud
I just quit my terrible job at the candy store. So long, suckers!
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks Work
My lettuce got angry with me and said, "Oh kale no!"
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks OneLiner Plants BetterOutLoud
Most people don't realize the angriest nut is the the pissed-achio.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks BetterOutLoud
My wife wanted me to put ketchup on the shopping list. Now I can't read any of it!
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks Relationships Shopping
Why do shooting stars taste better than comets? They are a little meteor.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks FunFact Space BetterOutLoud