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I got robbed by six dwarves yesterday. Not Happy.

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Crime Culture OneLiner

Two guys were arrested for stealing a calendar. They each got six months.

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Crime Time

Police are reporting they've arrested the Energizer Bunny. He's being charged with battery.

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Crime Culture

I think I'm going to give up my career as a cat burglar, way too many scratches.

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Animals Crime Work

I donated a kidney once and people loved me for it. But when I came back with five more, they wanted to call the police.

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Crime Medical Body

The man who stole my journal recently died. My thoughts are with his family.

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Crime Family Funeral

It seems killer whales have started attacking boats on the West Coast at an alarming rate. Police fear it might be an act of orca-nized crime. I think they fear there's a full on crime fin-dicate behind the attacks. Others believe the crime theory is a bit fishy, and boaters are just blubbering over mother nature fighting back. Either way, they are definitely doing it on porpoise.

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Animals Boats Crime Pun-Ishing Nature

Hobbits are lucky because they never get mugged. No criminal will stoop so low.

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Crime Fantasy KingsAndKingdoms

It's easy for thieves to stop other thieves from snatching up their territory. They just bandit.

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Crime Fantasy

You might think an assassin is lazy for staying in bed all day, but they're working undercover.

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Crime Fantasy FunFact

Its always hard to explain metaphors to thieves because they are always taking everything, literally.

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Crime Fantasy Words

I had trouble believing my friend was stealing all of the bar placards, but when I went to his house, the signs were all there.

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Crime